Trouble with Roommates: Communication



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Roommates. Best friends for life? Or mortal enemies? It is the great roommate roulette that leads to so many broken friendships, hurt feelings, and sinks full of dirty dishes. Even if you and your roommate are close as can be, there are always going to be disagreements.

Passive aggression is probably the most common problem with roommates. You have busy schedules, and you might not even know each other very well, so we tend to avoid any uncomfortable conversations, even if it’s something small. Try not to use texts and notes as your only form of communication. It may be easier but it can come off as rude or dismissive.

The “DEARMAN” technique can help you to approach difficult conversations with confidence and clarity. If you are on the receiving end of criticism, try to listen intently to what the other person is saying, and ask clarifying questions before responding.

DEAR MAN Technique

Your RAs can be a great resource for conflict resolution if your roomie isn’t willing to have a conversation. Remember that you have a right to privacy and that the common areas belong to everyone! And if things don’t work out, at least you’ll have a great story to tell!


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Written by Lucie Sullivan on Mar 02, 2021